Tuesday, December 2, 2014

[honesty is the best policy]

One unintended side effect of going to counseling is that I am more honest.I was talking to my dad about this and he said "I think you think you worry about hurting our feelings"(which is certainly true!) but I dunno, I feel like I can speak my mind.

I really needed to go to counseling-I have,in the past, and it was a huge help for me.Unfortunately, my boss at the time didn't think so, so I had to give it up,which I hated.

My current psychologist I have been seeing for quite a while.At the  time I started seeing him I had a lot of stuff that I wanted to talk to him about..I was definitely at a point where I needed to see someone-it was getting to a-crisis isn't quite the word, but I needed to talk to someone. He's made me examine the way that I do things, in a big way.

Take today, frinstance:I REALLY did not want to go to my psychologist's appointment because the weather was supposed to be very rainy.But I  told myself  "You know what?I am going to go out of my comfort zone and go out in this weather and if it rains on me, that's OK".

And I told him that when I saw him, and he was very impressed. It's also a sign of just how far I've come since I started seeing him. That's not to say that I don't still have moments where I..for lack of a word..have bad days. But it's something that I am working on.

For a while I was doing Morning Pages(3 pages of writing-about anything) and that combined with counseling was doing wonders for me. I think I have to start doing Morning Pages again.

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